2014. Waiting for her...

1/2/14

2014 has begun.

A year of waiting.

For her.

Waiting to get started on a journey I have thought about, prayed about, and sought after for 15 years.

Seeking you, Lord, in this time of waiting.

It already hasn't been easy for me.

I don’t like to wait.

I don’t like not being in control.

I’m afraid.

Afraid we won’t get matched quickly enough.

Afraid there will be problems with the paperwork.

Afraid we will somehow get a special need that is too much for us to handle.

Please take my fear in this long year of waiting.

Hold it, keep it, and turn it into PEACE.

You are my peace and you have called me to do this.

Not doing this would be turning my back on you.

I want to go where you send me.

I want to love the orphan.

I want the chance in this lifetime to love more children.

I want to be a mom to three children.

I desperately yearn for it so much that it feels like 2+ years is an eternity.

I know I have so much to learn.

I know she probably hasn't even been born yet.

So its ok.

This waiting.

Patience will make me stronger.

I am being refined.
Whether I like it or not.

Guide our family to the right agency please.

Guide our family to the right little girl please.

I yearn for her as I yearn for you and your direction in my life on a daily basis.

I love being a mom and I cannot wait to be expecting again.

This time in a very different but equally exciting way.